Thursday, February 05, 2009

Law of Diminishing Productivity

Your child will become sick on Friday night requiring you to drag yourself out of bed at 11:30 and haul yourself over to Grandma's house to retrieve said "sick child."

Your child will then refuse to sleep in their own bed because they are scared because they got sick and will instead insist on sleeping next to you thereby insuring the 5 hours of sleep that you are actually supposed to get will be fitful, making sure you don't roll onto said child.

That same child will then wake up bright and early on Saturday, say 5:30ish and refuse to go back to bed. Acting fine and dandy even though your work schedule is now screwed up because you can't get a babysitter because you are unsure if he is sick or not sick.

When you are done trying to get work done on Saturday and have time to actually baby a sick child said child will be fine. Running around and acting like nothing happened. They will insist on watching movies because mommy is boring but the minute mommy tries to get on the computer while they are watching movies they will DESPERATELY need something.

Said child will then be fine and chipper all day Sunday but come Monday at nap time they will again throw up just for added dramatic effect and to totally throw a wrench in your work week. Your child's daycare will insist that they are sick, even though you know that they just coughed too hard and gagged themselves.

This "sick" child will then proceed to act perfectly normal all of Monday afternoon but will be banned from daycare for 24 hours. Tuesday morning this same "sick" child will rise at the crack of dawn, about 15 minutes after Mommy tries desperately to get some work done since it is TAX SEASON.

Knowing that she has a meeting at 10:30 this same mommy will attempt to play with the child only to be thwarted in her efforts by a child insisting that they want to watch movies. Said child will watch movies quietly on their own for two hours and then a mere five minutes into mommy's hour long webinar will decide to dump an entire LARGE glass of water down thier front and then fill their diaper 45 minutes later.

So... how has your week gone??


kbreints said...

Better then yours. I just hope that all this sick does not find its way to my house-- but I have a feeling it will. ugh

OMH said...

My daughter has had a week like yours times 4 (of course none of the 4 have been sick at the same time)

But remember this too will pass and you can be on my side and say "hey I'm the grandma and I do not have to deal with this anymore.....goodnight" Actually I do try to help but children naturally want their mommy not grandma so I'm in the clear (big cheesy grin goes here)

Lindsey said...

Our whole family has what he has... it sucks.. it's been going on since Sunday. You're fine one minute icky the next. SUCKS. I feel sorry for said child.

KimN said...

Aw man. My week was somewhat similar but in reverse. I had the stomach flu with a very healthy child and husband who was out of town on business. Thank god for in-laws. They saved me.

Lynanne said...

I've got nothing for you, sorry. All of this makes my any gripes about my week seem trivial. Hope he starts feeling better soon and that YOU stay healthy. Hang in there!