Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Tuesday Talks

Zacky, did you pull someones hair today?

No, A pulled my hair like this. (He demonstrates.)

Well that was not very nice of A to pull your hair. Did you pull her hair back?

No I didn't.

Well your teacher told me you did. How do you think it makes A feel if you pull her hair? Do you think it makes her sad?

She didn't cry.


I get the feeling that my too smart for his own good two year old may be testing to see what he can, and can not get away with. If I do this... what happens? If she doesn't cry is it still bad?

At the same time, some of the behaviors that were in the notebook yesterday are concerning. Sitting next to a child and hitting them, unprovoked. Squishing a child between a table and the wall (repeatedly). Throwing toys at the wall, for no apparent reason.

All things I don't see at home but again, I don't have other kids at home. He has an extensive vocabulary. (As you can see from the conversation.) He can talk, he can tell people what he wants so I don't understand why he would feel the need to use violence to communicate.

I put him to bed early last night and I read him a couple extra stories. I'm trying to change things in our routine to see if anything could be triggering this. At the end of the day I think it presents more of a problem for me than for him. I want the world to see the sweet, loving child I have at home. Not the one that acts out at daycare. It might just be a stage but I don't have to like it.


Jennifer B. said...

It is so hard to understand why they do the things they do!

I remember when my son was 3 he bit a kid - on the chest - HARD! It was horrible, turned instantly purple, etc. and I thought he was WAY too old to be doing something like that. His explanation at the time was that he was a doggy and the other kid had come in his dog house (so he bit him, of course). Recently my son and I talked about when he did this and he had no recollection at all (even though I remember scolding him/talking about it for days afterwards) and I realized how young he really was at three - even though he seemed old enough to know better.

It is okay to be concerned (and yet another sign that you are a great mother!) but a couple of thoughts: when teachers say things are "unprovoked" they seldom are - they just didn't see the trigger that particular time or it wasn't obvious - I can almost guarantee that Z. is not just doing these things without a reason that makes perfect sense to a 2 year old). Also, if you looked at a list of the activities of every other child you would see that his behavior is perfectly developmentally normal.

You are doing all the right things and, as hard as it is, just know that all of the moms out there who have had 2-3 year olds have seen the same thing and the kiddos move on to some equally as perplexing and worrisome behavior :-)

You are a GOOD MOM!

Creative Genius? said...

I could have written your EXACT post as this is what's going on with Avi.... so you are not alone!!